Swept off your feet and then thrown in the dumpster

Swept off your feet and thrown in the dumpster! At least that is how most relationships end up feeling. One minute you are adored and the next you just aren't good enough. Some say that marriage is over rated and you can only keep the fire of a relationship going as long as there is no marriage. In other words as long as there is no commitment. I felt that unappreciative feeling in my own marriage and let me tell you as a woman there is no worst feeling than the one that you are no longer appreciated by your spouse. I had to dig deep inside myself to settle all the overwhelming emotions I was feeling during this time. I had the thought go threw my mind that the relationship that I wanted was unrealistic. But was it unrealistic? Is it right to say that we can have faith for healing, for prosperity and any other miracle but not for the happiness of our love life? I had to really find out the true meaning of love for myself. The first lesson was that love is not selfish. In other words it doesn't think of oneself. When you love someone you show your love with respect towards the other person. Meaning you don't come first. The reason why most woman don't feel appreciated is because they become so self involved with their needs and expectations that they create friction with their spouses. All they want is to receive but not willing to be the first to give. I know that to show someone love without selfishness is difficult initially but I can say that it will be rewarded and answered. Women run by emotions, how they feel or by what they want to feel. Men run by love, show a man love and he is happy. I wish I would of understood this seventeen years ago, it would of certainly have prevented a lot of disagreements and confusion. Respect towards the person you live with will equal respect towards you. The things that once annoyed me about my husband now make me laugh. Most importantly there is one important rule in my house "no one goes to bed upset" and I found that me and my husband need to come together every day and pray for our family. I started to see a calmness come over our children the moment we all started to pray together. Talking about my kids, I want them to have a visual of what type of relationship they will one day have. If they see me and dad treat each other with love and respect they will strive to have the same type of relationship one day. Like someone once said "children are lead by example". If they see the example of respect (no yelling or cursing), love and true joy they will be eager to follow and duplicate that into their own lives. So if you feel stuck in your marriage it is time for change and make the unselfish action to make the effort to show your spouse the respect you owe them. I can say that you will no longer feel that you were dumped in the trash and will with much effort feel the appreciation you are so eager to obtain, but remember you need to show respect to receive respect. You will need to show love to earn love. Don't pay evil with evil, cursing with cursing, manipulation with manipulation. Stop making yourself the victim and having a pity party and be the better godly person that will make the difference in the marriage. Your happiness in your marriage will be the greatest investment you will ever make. From it you will receive much deserved love and a wealth of blessings for your children's future.